Heartbreak

 This one's tough to write, but I want to get it off my chest.

Breeze died yesterday.

I had planned for a while to place her in a retirement home at some point. A part of me really wanted to keep her, but there were the beginnings of signs that she and Hazel might be starting to debate who the queen bee was, so I decided that I'd send Breeze off to her well-deserved retirement now rather than wait and see whether things would escalate.

I'd had a lady from Ohio who had been very interested in her for a while. We coordinated schedules and met in western Massachusetts yesterday afternoon. 

A little while after the handoff, though, I got frantic calls and messages from the new owner... Breeze had slipped her collar at a rest area and was running loose.

This is not uncommon - from now on I will always send adult dogs with a slip lead just in case. And often loose dogs go into panic mode and just run. 

I turned around and started booking it in their direction, but I was already an hour and 20 minutes away. When I was 40 minutes out, I got the word - Breeze had been hit on the highway and was gone. 

So I turned around once more and started back east, dropping Nory/Chestnut off with her person along the way. God gave me the grace to keep it together and stay safe on the road. I got home about 11pm and then hugged my dogs and cried.

Today has been a sad day. I'm just taking it slow and going through a lot of tissues. A lot of my grief centers around the poor lady who wanted Breeze - I hate to think of the stress and fear she felt when Breeze escaped and the pain of learning that she didn't make it. I'm grieving the loss of potential, too - Breeze was not even 5 yet. I'm sad that her new person won't get to learn her funny quirks...or see how excited she got when you would pick up her leash...or hear her funny little howl. 

I'm working to trust God, and I know He'll heal the hurt in time. I'm grateful for the 3 years I had with Breeze. And I'm grateful that her legacy lives on in the 18 beautiful puppies she gave me (plus 7 she had before she came to me). 

But wow, this is hard! Many thanks to those who have heard this already and have been praying for me and for Breeze's new person. I really appreciate you all. ❤️

LH's Cool Summer Breeze

April 3, 2018 - January 29, 2023